Ecritoire, van der Velde

Problem solving approaches of men and women

Men and women don’t really fit together when it comes to solve problems. It doesn’t matter how small or big, very often we run into troubles because we are very different in approaching topics, problems, challenges.

For example, we want to change our working space.
Sitting in front of a computer is not what we are longer doing for most of our time, we are working in different areas, house restoration e.g.. So we thought, we should change the place. On this point we agreed, but we did not talk, when and how we want to do it.
And now it started, or better, I started thinking around. Since a long time, I am not happy with the lightning, the glass tables, the place.

I dreamed of having an old secretary but soon realised my big screen wouldn’t fit. Then I searched the web for nice, stylish desks.
The desk imagine should be light and elegant and not emptying our bank account. What I found where lots of seventy-styled tables, in unpredictable quality which costs a fortune. This was very disenchanting!
Anyway, I shared some of my findings with my husband, just to make clear how I could imagine our future working area could look like. I did not want to buy any of those tables, it was only to get an idea.
He got it wrong. He does not like all that modern wannabe-design, especially not, when he saw the prices. His answer: we just want to have a working table, that means four legs and a table top. Why all this fuzz about?
I want to have it beautiful.
This sounds complicated in his ears.
It is 🙂

I experienced that men’s approach is more technically, they just want to solve a problem in the most cost-effective way and do not pay (enough?) attention on the beauty of the result.
Women are taking more factors into consideration, e.g. like how it fits into the rest of the room, on its beauty, the overall feeling, the materials, etc. They also like to share their thoughts while exploring a solution. For men this might often be to overwhelming and uncomfortable, too much time to discuss such things, seems to be getting expensive, etc.

Each of us did not want to steal time from the other, as we both have enough stuff to do but this was how the misunderstanding started.Finally, we spent about two hours to explain to each other our thoughts and feelings about this topic and searched together for beautiful tables and possible self-made solutions.
The good thing is, we are very complementary: he can better explain underlying technical concerns, I am good in creating solutions, we will find a good one for our working place 😉



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